Tips for the ladies in 2008

1. Aspire to be Barbie - the bitch has everything.

2. If the shoe fits - buy one in every colour.

3. Take life with a pinch of salt... A wedge of lime...and a shot of tequila.

4. In need of a support group? - Cocktail hour with the girls!

5. Go on the 30 day diet. (I'm on it and so far I've lost 15 days).

6. When life gets you down - just put on your big girl panties and deal with it.

7. Let your greatest fear be that there is no PMS and this is just your personality.

8. I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here..

9. Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself.

10. Don't get your knickers in a knot, it solves nothing; and makes you walk funny.

11. When life gives you lemons - turn it into lemonade then mix it with vodka.

12. Remember every good looking; sweet, single male is someone else's ex-boyfriend!

Its not even 9am and I am exhausted!

Noah decided to wake up at 6:45 this morning, which may not sound too early to some people, but the extra 15-20 mins was well needed this morning.  Its not so much the fact that he is up, its that he has to scream and whine till you free him from his crib jail which is SUPER annoying to listen to first thing in the morning.  Aggravated, I went in his room, gave him a book and told him to entertain himself while I took a shower. Its funny how he can sit there and read his book, but the MINUTE the shower turns off.....back to the dreaded whining!  So I am dripping wet, stumbling to find a towel and trying to get in his room as quickly as possible to silence the beast.  I go in there, take him out of bed and tell him to watch TV because I needed to get dressed.  And this was all before 7:15!  Needless to say, my day didn't start off on a good foot.

Then, everything we do now has become a battle of wills.  He used to be so compliant and did anything and EVERYTHING I asked of him, now everything is NO.  Or "no, no, noooooooo" as if I am trying to lower him in a pit of alligators or something.  It is exhausting!  And this can be anything from brushing his teeth, to throwing something in the garbage, to getting his shoes (all of which he LIKES to do)  I asked him to give me back his ear drops that he was playing with and he likes to play a game with me, he says no and turns away from me.  News flash:  Mommy is going to win so give it up kid!  So I took it out of his hands, set it on the table and said get over it...its ear drops!  He is trying to test every single boundary that he can and while I try and stay strong, I am sick and tired of hearing myself say "no" all the time.  

Is this what they call the terrible 2's?

Is time running out?

So Mike and I have been talking in depth about the possibility of having another baby.  He actually brought it up to me not to long ago which kind of shocked me, seeing as he has expressed to me he is perfectly happy with just one.  After having Noah, I knew I would want another one because I want Noah to have a sibling....someone to play with, someone to get in trouble with, someone that will look up to him as the Big Brother, and all the other things that come along with having siblings, mainly because I am an only child and never had that.  Plus I love my son to death and I want to share that love with another child.  Its funny because we were sooooooo not ready for Noah, but we made it happen financially.  We had no nest egg saved or anything, but like I said, we made it work.  Now, we are both in better jobs, making more money, but the financial stresses still worry me.  I mean, with the price of gas rising like it is, it is crazy. I was watching the news this morning and there was an analyst talking about how he predicts gas will be $7 a gallon in 2012...thats only 4 years away people!!  That definitely scare the shit out of me to hear that.  I remember when I started driving, gas was only $1.09 a gallon and $15 would fill up my tank for the week.  Now it  will barely get you to the next town and back.  Mike is super nervous about bringing another kid into this crazy world and I don't blame him.  Plus the cost of living in this area is outrageous. I am an avid watcher of HDTV's House Hunters and it makes me sick to my stomach knowing the average cost of a home in this area (Northeast/Fairfield County) is about $350K  while you have people looking in other areas (like the Midwest) for half of that, and getting much more.   We have realized that we are going to have to move one of these days because sinking all our money into a house is crazy.  I know we could find a nice house in a nice area for a fraction of what we would pay here.  However, I would have to have a great job lined up because unfortunately, I don't think I can work from home.  Anyway, getting back on tract.......

My financial worries include:
1.  2 kids in day care, which cost $230 a week for 1 which = $920 a month
2.  Formula (we spent about $120 a month for Noah)
3.  A  paycut for going on maternity leave - I had to wait almost 3 months to get disability from my last job while I was out on leave, which caused us to get WAY behind on our bills.
4.  Extra food and diapers, etc

Besides those, timing is an issue.  My job offers your full salary for 6 weeks of maternity leave after you have been here for 2 years.  My 2 years will be June 30 2009.  We have decided to postpone the wedding from this May to May 2009 so we can save more money.  We didn't want to go into a marriage with over 10k in debt, so postponement was a good idea for us.  However, that means we have to wait longer to conceive because I do not want to be preggo at my wedding because A) My dress wont fit  B) I wont be able to have a few drinks and just relax and C)  Going on my honeymoon preggo just doesn't sound appealing to me.
So with that said, the earliest we could start planning for baby #2 would be June 2009 which means, if we got preggo 1st try, the new baby would be born around March 2010 and Noah would already be 3 1/2.  I just don't want them to be to far apart and I have heard having them closer together is better because you are still in "baby" mode.  After 3+ years of not having to wake up every 2 hours in the middle of the night, am I going to be able to do it?  But then I think, I went 24 years of not having to and I adapted.  I guess its not the worse thing in the world to have kids 3-4 years apart and I stress over it more then I need to sometimes.  I have to be in control and have some sort of plan, but maybe letting nature run its course is the only thing I can do.  Fortunately I will still be in my 20's when we have #2 so hopefully my chances of conceiving will be easy, because many people I know have a hard time getting and staying pregnant.

The bright side:  Noah will be able to help with the new baby when he is alittle older...at least thats what I would like to hope!

A Toddler Free Evening and Morning

So this Saturday I went out with the girls and had a nice evening out, with no dirty diapers to change or indecisive toddler to try and please, and it was.....NICE!  A friend of mine had a Passions Party, which for those of you who don't know what they are, its basically a bunch of women getting together to look at fun stuff to use in the bedroom, from lotions and sprays, to other naughty unmentionables.  I will leave  what I bought out of this blog, because after all, its suppose to be private:)  My dad was watching Noah all on his own because Gina was out of town, and I have to say, he did a great job.  However I am sure he spoiled the heck out of Noah when he was there, but that's ok.  I mean, isn't that what grandparents are for?  Work didn't have any runs for Mike so had an unexpected night off,  which I know he enjoyed.  He kept asking when I was leaving so he could blast his music and enjoy his beer, it didn't bother me one bit though because I was looking forward to some drinks, good food and good friends.   Its so funny because as much as we love our son, a night to ourselves was long over due.  Its makes me look back on all the nights I had before he was born that I took for granted.  Now, I savor it to the best I can because they don't happen often.  I got home at 11 and crawled right into bed.   There is just something about going out and staying up till that time that tuckers me out.  On a normal night I am up till almost 12 and still not tired, but Saturday night I was pooped!  I am sure it had something to do with the Vodka and cranberry I was drinking :)

The next morning we woke up and it was sooooo nice not to have to jump out of bed to the whines of mamamammama or dadadadadadadda!  And we didn't wake up till 8:30 and didn't get out of bed till 9:30!!!  Man, I felt like I was on a vacation or something!  I don't remember the last time that happened.  Then we showered and went out for breakfast all with no rushing...ahhh!  It was great to have a morning to ourselves, but by the time breakfast was over, which was around 11:30, we were missing our little terror.

Then we picked him up from grabndpappy and its like noting ever changed.  Our little break was over and now we were pack in parenting mode......but it was fun while it lasted!

Time to stop and smell the roses

Yesterday I was home with Noah and it was so nice. At first I was exhausted and was hoping he would take a nap but he want tired. Then we started playing, and coloring and it was so much fun. I laid down on the floor next to him to color and he layed down like I was, it was so cute. He looked at me, and then tried to get in the same position I was in. Then we went outside and walked up to check the mail. We sat by the street and just watched the cars go by because, ever since he was an infant, he has LOVED cars and anything that "goes" So I sat there and watched as he got super excited every time a car, or truck drove by and yelled out "CAAAR" for each and every one. Then my dad came to visit and as we saw his car coming down the road, Noah goes "Grandpappy" I couldn't believe he knew THAT was grandpappys car. However, every time we see a white car, he thinks its grandpappys car, but this time it was different for some reason. I had such a great time with Noah yesterday and really got to ENJOY him without the hustle and bustle of cleaning, shopping or doing the laundry. I have lost site of these things lately because life gets in the way sometimes and you begin to take the small things for granted. I always try and keep us busy and occupied on the weekends because as a parent, I feel like it is my duty to expose my son to everything I can, but sometimes it is just nice to do nothing and enjoy eachothes company.

While I want this summer to be filled with field trips to fun places and lost of pictures capturing all things that are new to him, I also want to make sure I sit back and enjoy each and every moment to the fullest.

Noah still has a fever

Noah woke up this morning and we thought the fever had broke seeing as it had been an hour since the Tylenol wore off, and he was cool.  We were wrong.  Mike took him to school and he was burning up, so I called the doc and they told us to bring him in right away.  I am at work today...blah!  So Mike brought him to the ENT and they gave him a RX for eardrops AND antibiotics.  I thought he would be done with those once the tubes were in.  Plus he is coughing like crazy and it sounds like croup.  The doc says its probably from the anesthesia which I am hoping and that it isn't croup.   Mike brought Noah to Denny's for breakfast where he gobbled up his breakfast and now they are home and he is outside playing, doing fine.  I just want him to feel better and I want to be home with him instead of at work. I hate seeing him all moppy and out of it, it breaks my heart.

He is the cutest though.  When I was leaving to go to work today, he goes "bye Mommy"  It was so hard for me to leave after that and a big hug and kiss from him.  He is really starting to become a little boy.  

I am going home for lunch to give him a big hug and kiss!

Surgery was a sucess

Noah had his surgery this morning at 6:15 am. I was sooo not ready to get up at 5 and start getting ready and neither was Mike who didn't get home till 2am. Needless to say, we were all alittle tired today.

We were the first ones to get there and they took us right away which was great Not like Danbury Hospital where you get there 2 hours before and STILL wait another 2 hours to even see a doc. The nurses were awesome and supper friendly. They made Noah so comfortable and even made an arm bracelet for froggy. They also gave him a gown to wear that we called his bathrobe and he loved it. He was such a good boy, and I cant believe how much more he is looking like a "little boy" everyday. All the nurses loved him and kept telling us how cute he is....aw! Mike went into the room with him when they sedated him so he wasn't alone. He had to wear this white zip up body suit that made him look like the State Puff Marsh Mellow Man with a popped collar, cool booties and a lunch lady hat...man where was the camera when you need it? 2 breathes of the anesthesia and he was out. Mike said his whole body went limp....I don't think I could have handled that. We went back to the waiting room and 5 mins later (literally) the doc told us he was all done. We got to so see him and he was so agitated and disorientated from coming out of the anesthesia. Also, seeing as he has had the infection for over 3 months, his hearing was rapidly intensified and he was supper sensative to sound.

We took him home and just snuggled him. About an hour later he was fine, running around and coloring. Then my dad came over to see him for a bit. He eventually took an early nap because I am sure he was pooped.

We went to the park this afternoon with my friend Pam and her daughter Melody and Noah had so much fun, even though he was pooped. Def something to do again when he has a little more energy.

Before I put him to bed I checked his temp and it was 101.6 so I called the doc to make sure I shouldn't worry. They said anything over 102.5 I should call, otherwise check it every hour for the next 3 hours to make sure it is declining. I just checked it again and it was 100.6 I guess the Tylenol is working but I still worry about him. I hate seeing him uncomfortable and out of it.

Hopefully tomorrow the fever is gone along with this new cough he developed today due to the anesthesia.

I love you Momma!!

I just want to scoop him up and give him a big kiss. I mean come on, inst he just the cutest? This was taken today when we got home from surgery.

"On Being Mom" by Anna Quindlen

If not for the photographs, I might have a hard time believing they ever existed. The pensive infant with the swipe of dark bangs and the blackbutton eyes of a Raggedy Andy doll. The placid baby with the yellow ringlets and the high piping voice. The sturdy toddler with the lower lip that curled into an apostrophe above her chin. ALL MY BABIES are gone now.

I say this not in sorrow but in disbelief. I take great satisfaction in what I have today: three almost-adults, two taller than I am, one closing in fast. Three people who read the same books I do and have learned not to be afraid of disagreeing with me in their opinion of them, who sometimes tell vulgar jokes that make me laugh until I choke and cry, who need razor blades and shower gel and privacy, who want to keep their doors closed more than I like.

Who, miraculously, go to the bathroom, zip up their jackets and move food from plate to mouth all by themselves. Like the trick soap I bought for the bathroom with a rubber ducky at its center, the baby is buried deep within each, barely discernible except through the unreliable haze of the past.

Everything in all the books I once pored over is finished for me now. Penelope Leach., T. Berry Brazelton., Dr. Spock. The ones on sibling rivalry and sleeping through the night and early-childhood education, all grown obsolete.  

Along with "Goodnight Moon" and "Where the Wild Things Are," they are battered, spotted, well used. But I suspect that if you flipped the pages dust would rise like memories. What those books taught me, finally, and what the women on the playground taught me, and the well-meaning relations -- what they taught me was that they couldn't really teach me very much at all. Raising children is presented at first as a true-false test, then becomes multiple choice, until finally, far along, you realize that it is an endless essay. No one knows anything. One child responds well to positive reinforcement, another can be managed only with a stern voice and a timeout. One boy is toilet trained at 3, his brother at 2.

When my first child was born, parents were told to put baby to bed on his belly so that he would not choke on his own spit-up. By the time my last arrived, babies were put down on their backs because of research on sudden infant death syndrome. To a new parent this ever-shifting certainty is terrifying, and then soothing.

Eventually you must learn to trust yourself. Eventually the research will follow.

I remember 15 years ago poring over one of Dr.Brazelton's wonderful books on child development, in which he describes three different sorts of infants: average, quiet, and active. I was looking for a sub-quiet codicil for an 18-month-old who did not walk. Was there something wrong with his fat little legs? Was there something wrong with his tiny little mind? Was he developmentally delayed, physically challenged? Was I insane? Last year he went to China. Next year he goes to college. He can talk just fine. He can walk, too.

Every part of raising children is humbling, too. Believe me, mistakes were made. They have all been enshrined in the "Remember-When-Mom-Did" Hall of Fame The outbursts, the temper tantrums, the bad language, mine, not theirs. The times the baby fell off the bed. The times I arrived late for preschool pickup. The nightmare sleepover. The horrible summer camp. The day when the youngest came barreling out of the classroom with a 98 on her geography test, and I responded, What did you get wrong? (She insisted I include that.) The time I ordered food at the McDonald's drive-through speaker and then drove away without picking it up from the window. (They all insisted I include that.) I did not allow them to watch the Simpson's for the first two seasons. What was I thinking?

But the biggest mistake I made is the one that most of us make while doing this. I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of the three of them sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages 6, 4 and 1. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less.

Even today I'm not sure what worked and what didn't, what was me and what was simply life. When they were very small, I suppose I thought someday they would become who they were because of what I'd done. Now I suspect they simply grew into their true selves because they demanded in a thousand ways that I back off and let them be.

The books said to be relaxed and I was often tense, matter-of-fact and I was sometimes over the top. And look how it all turned out. I wound up with the three people I like best in the world, who have done more than anyone to excavate my essential humanity. That's what the books never told me. I was bound and determined to learn from the experts.

It just took me a while to figure out who the experts were.

Job Opening... A Must Read!!

This is hysterical. If it had been presented this way, no one would have done it!!!!


J OB DESCRIPTION- MOM

POSITION :
Mother, Mom, Mama, Mommy, Momma, Ma

JOB DESCRIPTION:
Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work in an, often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call. Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities. Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required.

RESPONSIBILITIES:
The rest of your life. Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5. Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case, this time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers. Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of multiple homework projects . Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks. Must be willing to be indispensable one minute, an embarrassment the next. Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end product. Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility.

POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT &PROMOTION:
Virtually none. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you

PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE :
None required unfortunately. On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.

WAGES AND COMPENSATION :
Get this! You pay them! Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent. When you die, you give  them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.

BENEFITS :
While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth and free hugs for life if you play your cards right.

Ear Tubes it is

Noah had his ENT appointment this morning to check on the status of his ear infections and......yup......they are BOTH still infected. He has been on 4 different kinds of antibiotics with the last ones really taking a told on his tummy and still, no luck at clearing them up.

My friend Bianca told me her son had them put in and at first she was nervous like Mike and I, but she assured me it was quick and painless. The doctor also said this but its always nice to hear it from a "real" person and not a doctor who doesn't have to care for the child afterwards....nothing is ever a big deal to them. But anyway, he said it should be about a 10 min procedure and is scheduled for this Wednesday. No foods or beverages after midnight Tuesday, and we have to be their tentatively for 7:30, which means we should arrive an hour before and I am sure Noah is going to be cranky seeing as he like to sleep in lately....till a whopping 7:45!

Wish us luck!!

My son thinks he's a fish

Saturday the weather was BEAUTIFUL and we got outside to use our new pool. My parents had bought it last year and never infalted the thing so they gave it to us to use for Noah this year. Well, after blowing in the damn thing for what seemed like an eternity, I realized why they got rid of it! All that blowing and not even a dent in it!! Thankfully my landlord has every tool you could imagine in his garage and saved our buts with an air compressor...thank the lord!! Otherwise Noah would not be using it till he was 10, when we finally got it blown up.

Here is a pictorial update of the weekend:
Noah and his uncle Dan:
This is Noah's cheeeeeese face:



Apparently my son thought the water should be OUTSIDE the pool and proceeded to dump it all out and make lots of mud. Its funny how when you are a kid you can never get dirty enough, but he enjoyed sitting there in wet clothes and muddy feet:)
Someone was thirsty, ya think?

Boycotting Dunkin Donuts

As I was driving to work this morning, I thought it would be a great day for an iced coffee from Dunkin Donuts, seeing as it is supposed to get into the 80's today. When I got to the drive-through I was shocked to see it was .70 MORE for an iced coffee then a hot one!!! How ridiculous is this! I mean, what are you paying for here? Ice is free and you are actually getting LESS coffee and milk because it is HALF ice!! Highway robbery if you ask me! The I asked for 4 sugars, but soon after realized it was going to be super sweet, seeing as I usually get a medium and this time I got a small. Well I could have asked for 10 sugars and it wouldn't have mattered because I got NONE. This is the 4th time I have went there (and not always the same place) where they have given me NO sugar! How do I know they have jipped me in the sugar department you ask? Well when they put sugar in an ice coffee you can always see it all on the bottom of the cup because the a$$holes do not stir it. It was not there, hence I was jipped! Thankfully I was going to the office and was able to sweeten it up, but if I was all ready to go for a drive I would have been super mad to have to drink and unsweetened cup of iced coffee. Not to sound like a snot, but how hard is it to remember 4 sugars? Its not brain surgery folks. And every time I go there I got more and more pissed off and say to myself "This is going to be the last time," yet I still go back.

I need to find a new place to get coffee and I am officially going to boycott DD in the coffee department. They still make great coffee coolattats and if they weren't $4 for a small and a million calories, I would have them more often.

The Binky Monster

My son is completely and utterly addicted to his binky. Last night we were driving home from school and he dropped it in his seat but couldn't find it. So first he started the whining "booookie, booookie" (as he likes to call it) Then when I didn't pull over to get it as the King demanded, he started with the hysterical antics that could have won him an Oscar. I was driving down Main St at 5:30 on a weekday with all the retards in Danbury that don't know how to drive in the first place...... there was no way in hell I was pulling over when I was only 5 mins from my house. Let me tell you, those 5 mins felt more like 50! Now he is literally screaming and carrying on like you think what I did to him. First its just regular fake crying, then the drama queens stats to shriek, it was ear piercing. Part of me felt bad because he was getting so upset over it, and part of me was thinking "All this over a binky.....get over it!" I didn't know whether to tell him to the shut the @$^$* up, or just laugh...so I laughed. And don't worry people, I wouldn't really tell my kid to shut the F!@$ up, but lord knows I def think about it!

So we get home and the binky was right within reaching distance of him! As usual he made a big deal over noting. Then I let the little monster out to let off some steam on his playset, which worked well. However he has a weird obsession with my landlord and loves to say hi to hm repeatedly. "Hi Bob,Hi Bob, Hi Bob" over and over and over again, lol. It is so funny and strange all at the same time. However if Bob tries to pick him up, he will run over to us and burry his head in our crotch.

Although my idea of letting him let off some stem was a good idea, trying to get him back inside was not so easy. He runs away from me going "no upstairs, no upstairs" So first I tried telling him I was going up anyway and leaving him outside. I walk away, shut the door, go to look out to window to make sure he doesn't take this opportunity to try and escape, and he is stilling playing...unphased by the fact that I left him there!

Plan B: I go back out and in my most funniest voice I ask him if he wants to wash his hands.....and he says yes!! Score! He shuts the door to his car and comes inside, however as soon as I close the door, he freaks again and tried to get back out. Again, I go upstairs without him, thinking he will follow, but he is on to my plan and just sits there and whines.

So now I have to pick up the little beast and drag him inside kicking and screaming....ahhhhh...... never a dull moment in my house hold!

His diarrhea is getting better, but he still has a wicked diaper rash and woke up screaming at 4:45am!! I was hoping after a few minutes he would stop but no luck. After thinking about what I would want to yell at him (i.e. shut the f^#*)% up) I get up and change him, put him back down and still no luck. So at this point I only have 2 hours left before I HAVE to get up for work, so I just bring him to bed with me and he passes right out. Then he wakes me up at 6:45 with "Hi Mommy" soooo cute! I instantly forgot how tired I was waking up and seeing his cute little face!

On a more serious note

So I am having a hard time wrapping my mind around death lately. Last night I had a dream about a fellow high school classmate of mine who died sometime before we graduated. I used to live in Putnam County and it is famous for its narrow windy roads. Kids in my school drove supped up Hondas and handled the roads like they were a race course. Well one rainy night, my classmates car ran off the road into a tree and died. We weren't best friends, but my school was small enough where I knew everyone, plus we used to sit next to each other in art class. I couldn't believe what happened nor could anyone else in my school,it was truly a very sad period. I never went to the wake or funeral though because I think I was "busy". Now that I look back on it, I regret not going and paying my respects, but when you are in high school, the world doesn't seem as serious as it does now, a least that how it was for me. Now I think, that was someone's child, someone's brother, and I couldn't even imagine what I would do or how I would feel if something were to happen to Noah. I think he has really changed the way I look at everything, I get way more emotional nowadays, and realize I must savor each and every moment of our lives, because you never know when it will be your last. I don't mean to sound so pessimistic, and I don't go around being depressed over it, it has just made me cherish everything so much more then I did.

The dream def threw me for a loop because it literally came out of nowhere, I haven't been thinking about high school or anything like that. I need o talk with a dream consultant about this because it is really baffling me.

A friend of me and Mikes also died this year and that has been really rough on me as well. I guess its because he lived with us for 4-5 months right after Noah was born so we were close. It turned out that living together did more harm then good to all of us, we felt disrespected and it was not a healthy situation for any of us. We ended up kicking him out and he went to live with the crackhead down the hall (who was also part of the problem) Mike and I were no angles by any means, but we straightened our asses out. After that we heard he moved to NJ and then his mom called us some time in January of this year and told us he had died...he was only 22. I still think it about it at least once a week and it brings me tears. He was so young and so smart, and he let drugs get the best of him. The sad part is that Mike and I were not surprised when we found out he died and what the cause was. He was headed down a very scary road when he left us and we really feared for him. Mike feels like it was his fault but I try and tell him that it wasn't. We tried our best, or what we thought was our best to help him, but he was an adult. Looking back on it now, I would have done things differently and maybe not have kicked him out so quickly, but we had an infant to think about as well. And like I said, we made our share of mistakes as well but we couldn't put him on lockdown. He was an adult and choose to do what he did, its just so sad. He OD'd and all I can think about was if he was alone when he died? Or were there people there who were too scared or f'd up to call an ambulance and let him die? It really bothers me that I will never know and my heart breaks for him mom, who is a cancer survivor and has had a very rough life. Her only child is gone now, but she still manages to stay positive.

Life is so short and can be taken away in an instance. Cherish every moment as if it were your last and don't forget to tell the people in your life how much you love them, because one day, it may be too late.

I am so grateful that I have a wonderful family that I can go home to every night and give them a big hug. Noah will always know how much we care about him because I tell him I love him everyday.

Good Friends and Good Eats

Last night Noah and I went out to Denny;s with my friend Pam, her hubby and her daughter Melody. I meet Pam over a year ago at the Mommy group in Bethel and it has been great that we have stayed in touch even after group was over. Her daughter is 2 months older then Noah and it is really important to have friends that are going through the same things as you....... you find that you have more in common then just a toddler. While I have my friends from high school, and friends that I meet since moving to CT, my life is so much more different then it was 2 years ago. And even though I consider those people good friends, our lives are completely different and at times it seems like all we have in common are our ages. So like I said, its nice to have friends that can relate to my life now, and while we don't talk everyday, when we do, it is always a good time.

So anyway, we went to Denny's and picked a Tuesday because kids eat free....hey, every penny counts! And it was a good time. Melody was upset when we got there because she doent like to hear "no" so Pam had to take her outside to calm her down. I felt a sigh of relief when I saw that and thought to myself "At least I am not the only one with the temper tantrum throwing toddler." I remember dragging Noah out of Friendlys because he freaked out and threw himself on the ground because he didn't want to eat. Then the food came and he was fine? But its Denny's, not like an upscale restaurant or anything. The kids had fun playing with their goldfish and even decided to have a screaming contest at the end, but we were almost out the door by then. All in all, it was a great time and def nice to have a change of scenery, for me and Noah.

Hopefully next time we can plan to for a thurs so Mike can come too.

Pics from the weekend and an update on my little monster

Fun in the sun!!!

Noah and daddy:

The weather was BEAUTIFUL on Saturday with sunny skies and temperature of 65 degrees! I loved it and I was so happy I was able to put on my new capris and tanktop that I was tiching to wear! Warm weather is in our near future and I cant wait!! We were able to get outside with our new playset and enjoy the great weather. I also got some updated pics of Dan, Noah and Mike.

Ok so an update on Noah: Apparently the antibiotics that he is on now are super strong and have been upsetting his stomach. He started them on Thurs night and the next morning it looked like a bomb went off in his crib.....a POOP bomb! So we traded in an ear infection for diareah....great!! The poor little guy had them the next 2 mornings and was very lathergic so I decided to call his pediatrician....thank the lord they are open on weekends. The nurse I spoke to said they were upsetting his stomach and this is pretty common. She also said to get him Acidopholus which is suppsoed to replenish the good bcateria he is pooping out. I actualyl took them when I was preggo with Noah but ended up throwing them out because I figured, when the hell am I ever going to use those again? Well I was wrong and we had to get more, and they were not cheap! $9 for the CVS gerneric brand...I couldnt belive it! So anyway, we have to open the capsule and disolve the powder into applesauce, milk or yougurt. Last night was the first time we did it and this morning....no diareaha....figures that mommy gets all the messy diapers and daddy gets away with just a little turd! But anywhoo, Noah is feeling much better and that makes us all very happy.

I love my son, but this weekend he was a little monster and I know it is because he is not feeling well but enough is enough already! Sat night all he wanted to do was cry and refused to eat unless he was sitting on MY lap which made it difficukt for me to eat. But I gave in and let him sit and eat, until he started dropping his macaroni and meatballs on the floor....then it was back to the chair and he did NOT liek that. He continued to throw a fit and cry so I gobbled down my food so I could go sit with him. He ate NO dinner that night and went to bed at 8. Sunday he woke up on the wrong side of the crib and wasnt happy with anyhitng. He had no idea what he wanted but expectd me and everyone else arond him to know what he wanted. He lieks to sit in his bed now and cry mamamamamma......dadadaddadadaad! Over and over and over again. It i so funny because he sounds so pitiful. Then we go get him and he is all smiles. My friend jokes about putting a "for free" on her son and leaving him outside....this was def a weekend for that!

And now its monday and back to the weekly grind.....is the weekend here yet?

Noahs new playset

The Playset


Going down the slide like a big boy:

Daddy giving Noah a little boost:

So this weekend Noah got a brand new playset for FREE courtesy of a co-workers friend who was giving it away! We had no idea it was this big when we went to pick it up and were floored that she didn't want any money for it. I looked it up on the Little Tykes website and it was $500!! We were so fortunate to get this for him and are ready for a summer full of playdates galore!!

Noah is already 20 months old!

What a load of crap....literally!

Well before I address the title of my lovely post, I would like to start off my saying Noah STILL has an ear infection. The right one is completely better but the left one is still infected....not bad for 2 weeks with only multiviatamins....maybe the chiropractor wasn't as nutty as I thought. I am not sure what kind of antibiotics he is on this time (every time she tries something new) but they smell like lemons and by the look on Noah's face, I can tell they don't taste the best either. Next time I will spend the extra $2.99 and have the nice Walgreen Pharmacist put some flavoring in it for him. I swear, Noah must be the only kid who ENJOYS taking his meds, he is like a salivating puppy dog waiting as I get them ready for him, and he even ASKS me to take them? Crazy Kid!

So back to the title of my post: We have been trying to get Noah to tell us when he pooped, which is one of the first steps in him becoming potty trained, and he tells us 8 out of 10 times which is pretty good. I was giving him a bath last night and as we were finishing up, he tells me he has to poop. I quickly try and get him out of the tub and on to the potty, trying to figure out how not to get the bathroom floor soaked....but it was too late......poop all in the tub! Man it was so gross and smelled like....well.....poop! I tried to push it down the drain but it was STUCK and I was going to have to put some real elbow grease into getting it off the floor of the tub. That's where daddy stepped in. I had to get Noah dressed so it was Mike's job to be the pooper-scooper. Which led me to thinking, once he is potty trained I am going to have to clean up poop alot! I am investing in some rubber gloves...yuck!

I guess Noah didn't want me to feel left out of the pooper scooper experience because this morning he greeted me with a great big smile, and a diaper full of more poop! Man, I don't know where it all came from, he went before he went to bed and now AGAIN? I looked down his pants and saw my worst nightmare.....it had oozed out of his pants down his leg. Now those of you who don't have kids and are reading this must be thinking I am pretty disgusting, but those of you with kids are sitting there laughing because you can totally relate. So I ripped his pants off, threw them in the trash and threw him in the tub. And this was all before 7:30am......fun, fun, fun!!

A light at the end of the tunnel?

So tomorrow is Noah's check up to see if his ear infection cleared up and I am not feeling very optimistic about it because I know he is still sick. The poor kid has had this ear infection since February and I just want him to feel better. The funny thing is that we didn't even know he had one because he is always in such a good mood. He went for his 18 months shots and he had a double infection so they couldn't give them to him till it cleared up. Now he is 2 months behind! Well we have been to the doctors every 2 weeks since then in hopes of it being better and we have had no luck. His doctor kept prescribing him different anti-biotics in hopes one of them would clear it up and no luck. She said the "rule" for getting tubes is 5 infections in one season or 3 months straight of an ear infection. The last week of this month will make 3 months.

Last visit I told her I didn't want him back on the antibiotics because they aren't doing any good and I heard consistently taking them can be bad for the immune system. So tomorrow if he still has one (which I know he does) he will go back on them and come back in another 2 weeks...ugh! I don't think I have been to the doctor this much since I was preggo. I already scheduled an appointment with the ENT for April 21 incase tubes are worse case scenario. I just want him to be healthy again. I really do not want him to get tubes. I know it is very common but I don't want to subject him to that. A fellow mom friend of mine however eased my tension alittle when she told me her son had then over a year ago and they were the best thing for him. He, like Noah, was doomed to a life of antibiotics and he has been fine since the surgery. They even ended up taking them out eventually because he was doing so much better. And her son is only 3 months older then Noah so that helps as well. I do have to admit, for being sick one could never tell. He is so happy all the time (except for his whinny little fits now and then) I am sooo looking forward to picking him up and playing on his slide at home. He loves the darn thing and runs right over to it when we get home.

1 hour to go and then I am outta here!

Hyperactivity at its finest

Noah amazes me more and more each day. Dan (Mikes little brother, well not so little anymore seeing as he is 18) came to visit on Sunday for the week. At first Noah was very skeptical of the new person stuck in the back seat with him, but after a fun filled trip to Walmart packed with cup of noodle soups and batteries, Noah and Dan became good friends. We get home and Noah is WIRED! Like someone gave him 5 packets of pixie sticks, lol. He is running all through the house with is hands up in the air, screaming in excitement. Its was so cute but we had no idea what go into him, he is always so calm. Then it hit us....he is showing off for the big boy and wants to be big too! He loves having his uncle Dan around and Dan is so good with him.He reads him stories and plays with him and even makes sure he cleans up :) Then yesterday after I take Noah to the Dominican Barber Shop to get a big boy fade, we go home and again, Noah is so WIRED he was making me tired. Where does he get all this energy from after a long day at school? And there he goes, gibber jabbering away all night, it was the cutest thing. I would have LOVED to capture that on film but sadly, my camera is BROKEN!! I don't know what happened but it just stopped working the other day. I tried new batteries and everything and no luck.....booo! Now I have to spend money I didn't want to to buy a new one. And since mine wasn't the best, I had intended to get a better one, but just not so soon. Taking my camera away from me is like taking away coffee from a graveyard shift worker...needless to say I am very upset.

ABC....123!

So I had planned on writing on here alot more then I have been but unfortunately I have been super busy at work seeing as it is month end. Here is a synopsis of what has been going on in our world lately:

Noah continues to amaze me everyday with all the new things he is learning. This morning, Mike sneezed and Noah goes "God bless you daddy" Mike and I looked at eachother in pure amazement. And to think I say god bless you to him all the time when he sneezes not thinking he is absorbing it, but now he understands what it means AND when to use it! Then yesterday I asked him how old he is and goes "1" and then proceeds to count with me up to 5. I have been stopping at 5 because I don't want to over load his little brain trying to go up to 10 BUT he continued counting without me coaching him!!!!! Again, Mike and I were floored. He is not even 2 and he can count to 10 on his own! I know he is my kid but man is he smart!!!

My little baby is no longer a baby anymore, he is a toddler. And while the idea of him growing up fascinates me and scares me all at the same time, it is alittle sad as well. I wish I would have relished in all the cute little things he did for the first time and the milestones because everyone was so right when they said it goes by so fast because IT DOES! I wish I didn't want to rush through everything just to try solids and see him crawl, and then walk. It seems like just yesterday I was holding him in the hospital after I delivered him. And now he is starting to tell us when he pooped! He goes "Daddy, I pooped" It is the cutest thing. However sometimes when you ask him and hasn't, he stills say he did. So we have to check Mr Stinky pants just in case :)
I love him to pieces and Mike and I are eager to have #2 however timing is not right now. Although I don't think you can ever be financially stable for a baby (unless you are Branglina) we want to have a little nest egg before we have baby Adams #2.

With that said, we also want to have a stable home (meaning a place we own and not rent) My dad and stepmom have graciously offered to help us in the purchase of a new place. So what that means is they are going to finance it and we are going to pay the mortgage. They are putting their credit on the line to help us get started and we are so very grateful to them for doing that. My dad being our Realtor helps too :) We put in an offer on the condo in Danbury and are hoping we get it. Because it is bank owned and what they consider a short sale, it may take as long as a couple months to get an answer on whether they accepted our offer. And a special thanks to all those HGTV specials I watch so I know what "short sale" is. We put in a low bid and are really hoping they accept because their is another offer as well. We will keep our fingers crossed and if it is meant to be, it will be.

Mike and I are doing GREAT, better then ever. Well maybe I should say back to how we were BN (Before Noah that is) What I mean by that is while having a child is the most amazing experience of our lives, it definitely changes the dynamic of a relationship and I feel like we are finally comfortable with the way everything is and surprisingly stress free. Its like when we were dating but we have a kid now. And while their are everyday stresses, we don't let them get to us like we did. We are a team, and best friends. I couldn't ask fr anything more :)